I’m Going to Speak at My Old Jr. High About Mental Health

Image: Omar Flores via Unsplash

I’ve been asked to come back to my old Jr. High School to speak to a gym filled with 600 kids about mental health. I’m really excited about it.

My favourite teacher of all time is the one who’s invited me (I adore her) and I’ve actually spent a great deal of time lately thinking about what it must be like to be a kid/tween/teen in today’s world, so this felt like a perfect impetus to really dig in and get some of my thoughts out.

I’ve been thinking about how hard life can feel sometimes, even as a reasonably well-adjusted adult with plenty of supports and resources, and then I’ll come across another one of the seemingly infinite articles about rising rates of teen depression and suicide. This causes me to think back on how scary and confusing it often felt to be a kid - or even a young adult - without any of the necessary language or tools to properly address some of life’s biggest feelings and challenges.

I worry about young people.

Maybe it’s just my algorithm, but all I seem to hear and read about young people these days is that they’re feeling anxious, depressed, hopeless, directionless etc.

So I posed the following question to Chat-GPT4 (who else?):

”What are young people struggling with most these days?”

Here is what it said (you can click to enlarge):

View fullsize

To summarize that list in bullet / form:

1. Mental health issues

2. Social media and comparison

3. Economic instability

4. Climate change concerns

5. Political polarization and social unrest

6. Academic and career pressures

7. Navigating relationships

8. Identity and self-discovery

9. Balancing responsibilities

10. Access to healthcare
    

As I look at this list, I remember struggling, significantly, with at least seven of these in my teens and early 20’s (I was fortunate enough to be shielded from and/or ignorant of economic instability, climate change concerns, political/social unrest, and access to healthcare), but I’m not sure that I ever heard or saw any these ten struggles labelled or discussed in a meaningful way.

• I remember being so anxious in Jr. High and High School that I often slept less than two hours per night (at one point for about two years straight), but had never heard of “anxiety”.

• I was depressed in University and often had suicidal thoughts, but never once considered going to therapy or any similar outlet.

• My depression stemmed largely from my struggles navigating relationships (of all kinds), but I’d never come across any helpful resources for how to deal with those kinds of struggles.

• I felt a vague, dull, and aimless sense of pressure to finish my degree, “get my piece of paper”, and then find a career, but I’d never had an honest or truly helpful conversation about how I might find a sense of purpose/challenge/fulfillment in my work.

My former teacher told me that she reached out because she’s followed a bit of my journey on social media, where I’ve shared quite a few intimate details about my own challenges and learnings over the years, and she felt that I might have some experiences, knowledge, or advice to share with these kids about mental health and healthy lifestyle (all of which I’m very flattered by).

So now I’ve got the challenge of figuring out how I can best use 45 minutes in a gym filled with 600 iPhone-wielding teens/tweens, to try to help at least handful of them feel a bit more hopeful, a bit less confused, and maybe even a little less alone.

The optimist in me imagines a room full of kids bawling, hugging each other, thanking me through their teary eyes for the instantaneous salvation from all of life’s suffering.

The realist in me remembers a story from my friend John, the most charismatic person I know, who commands every room he is in, about the time he filled in as a substitute teacher while studying law in London and “lost the room”, being berated by the kids and forced to call the principal for help.

I guess I also need to remember and acknowledge that I’m not a trained health professional of any kind. All I can really do is share my experiences and some of the tools that have been helpful for me.

I’m asking myself a few different questions now as I prepare:

• What did I need to hear when I was that age?

• What was I ready to hear when I was that age? Like, what would my level of receptivity really have been to some of these different topics/messages/ideas?

• How can I try to relate to these kids and build a bit of trust so that they want to listen? Storytelling? Humour? Engaging them more in the conversation?
  

I could use your help.

Are you close to any young people between the ages of 10-15? Do you have any insights?

Can you remember some of your struggles and what you needed?

Do you have any other ideas for me? Any thoughts at all would sincerely be appreciated.

You can email me at dave@threesixfive.ca or DM me on Instagram if you’d like to share.

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